Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
