STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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