The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
