Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
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