this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
