Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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