I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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