..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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