suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
