Will you blow on my dice?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
