So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
