The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
