My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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