I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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