no. you can't hotbox the world.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
