literally had 100 drinks last night.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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