Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
