my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
