I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you are never too drunk for berry picking
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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