Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Success! We fucked roommates!
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
