Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Randomize
