I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
