are you still at the devil's house?
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
