So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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