i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
