there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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