Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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