I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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