her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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