Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
His hands were made for my vagina.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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