If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
