I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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