its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Bring me that man meat
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
