glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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