my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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