Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
