remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
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Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
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Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I need to calm my uterus...
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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