I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize