yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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