Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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