If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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