Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
What drink are we having for lunch?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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