My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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