I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
