you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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