I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
