And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize