hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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