Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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