better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
