dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
